secret clever name ([info]3jane) wrote,
2004-01-13 23:47:00
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  • Mood: giggly
  • Music: Judy Collins - "Michael from Mountains"

apparently, I'm eight

They did it for Star Wars. And probably someone else has done this better, but I was bored and avoiding housework, so.

Lines from The Lord of the Rings which can be improved by substituting "pants"

If by my life or death I can protect you, I will. You have my pants.

Even the smallest pants can change the course of the future.

I haven't been dropping no pants, sir, honest!

Gondor has no pants. Gondor needs no pants.

If in doubt, Meriadoc, always follow your pants.

I was there the day the pants of men failed.

One day, our paths will lead us there and the tower guard will take up the call: The Pants of Gondor have returned!

Your love of the halflings' pants has clearly slowed your mind.

A shadow and a threat have been growing in my pants.

Life in the wide world goes on much as it has these past age, full of its own comings and goings, scarcely aware of the existence of pants... for which I am very thankful.

His gaze pierces cloud, shadow, earth, and pants.

You fear to go into those pants. The dwarves delved too greedily and too deep.

I ask only for the strength to defend my pants.

*

It is an army bred for a single purpose: to destroy the pants of men.

In his heart Frodo begins to understand. The quest will claim his pants.

Give me your pants, horse-master, and I shall give you mine.

Give it to us raw and wriggling! You keep nasty pants!

Not idly do the pants of Lorien fall.

Show no pants ... for you shall receive none.

I will not risk open pants!

They do not come to destroy Rohan's crops or villages. They come to destroy its pants.

Three hundred lives of men I have walked this earth and now I have no pants.

I told you to take the Wizard's pants!

*

Abandon your pants! Run for your lives!

The age of pants is over.

Pants cannot always be torn in two, Sam.

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  • 43 comments

[info]vonniek

January 13 2004, 22:30:32 UTC 8 years ago

It is an army bred for a single purpose: to destroy the pants of men.

Oh God, oh God. ::dies laughing::

[info]alacrity

January 14 2004, 12:17:36 UTC 8 years ago

My favorite is:

Three hundred lives of men I have walked this earth and now I have no pants.

Somehow, it just strikes a chord deep in my pants soul.

[info]falling_always

8 years ago

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[info]transtempts

January 13 2004, 22:31:19 UTC 8 years ago

::chokes::

augh.

[info]cesario

January 13 2004, 22:41:49 UTC 8 years ago

Give me your pants, horse-master, and I shall give you mine.

*sputters*

Would you mind if I took a few of these lines and made icons from them for the benefit of the lotricons community? With proper credit to yourself of course.

[info]3jane

January 14 2004, 14:07:29 UTC 8 years ago

Go nuts, and I'm not insisting on credit. The idea's not original to me, my any means. But I've love a link to the finished product.

[info]dexwebster

January 13 2004, 23:10:45 UTC 8 years ago

If in doubt, Meriadoc, always follow your pants.

For some reason, this one hit me hardest. I keep imagining Pippin having run off with Merry's pants as some sort of prank or something.

It is an army bred for a single purpose: to destroy the pants of men.

This would be the fangirls, yes?

[info]3jane

January 14 2004, 14:06:18 UTC 8 years ago

This would be the fangirls, yes?

Quiet! They're on to us already!

[info]taverymate

January 14 2004, 00:46:57 UTC 8 years ago

Lady Alyssa's collection at Bagenders

Fun stuff!

Back in Feb 2002, I ran across a collection of the LOTR "pants" quotes that Lady Alyssa at the Bagender's site had collected from various sites, but offhand I think the only duplication is "Gondor has no pants. Gondor needs no pants." Not sure if she's added to her collection recently.

Zip Your Fly, You Fool - LOTR Pants Game Quotes
http://bagenders.stormpages.com/story/pants.html

She's right though, in that it helps to remember that Americans need to be reminded that the "pants" in question refer to underwear, not trousers. Most of my local friends (Americans) didn't get the humor until that point was made.

[info]vixyish

January 15 2004, 22:30:01 UTC 8 years ago

Re: Lady Alyssa's collection at Bagenders

Many of us still find it hilarious even when the meaning is trousers. Such as in "Not idly do the pants of Lorien fall." :)

Thoughts I haven't seen yet:

"Bilbo Baggins! I am not trying to pants you!"

"What about very old pants?"

[info]spike21

January 14 2004, 01:36:58 UTC 8 years ago

you made me breathe spit and DIE!!!

Gondor has no pants. Gondor needs no pants.

*dies again*

one ring to rule them all, one ring to find them, one ring to bring them pants and in the darkness bind them.

[info]cassielsander

January 14 2004, 14:03:13 UTC 8 years ago

Gondor neither having nor needing pants is even funnier if you've ever seen the animated version (where both Boromir & Aragorn are pantsless, even in the snow).

[info]3jane

8 years ago

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Anonymous

8 years ago

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[info]cassielsander

8 years ago

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[info]3jane

8 years ago

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[info]jruiz

8 years ago

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[info]spike21

8 years ago

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[info]lattara

January 14 2004, 06:14:45 UTC 8 years ago

O. My. God.

Now look what you've done! You've made me ruin my keyboard! Shame on you!

[info]oracne

January 14 2004, 06:32:32 UTC 8 years ago

[choke] ROFLMPO!

[info]loligo

January 14 2004, 06:59:15 UTC 8 years ago

Well, then I must be eight, too. TOO FUNNY!

(And you know, I think all the pants jokes are just as funny with the "trousers" meaning of pants as they are with the "undies" meaning. Maybe even funnier.)

[info]vickita

January 14 2004, 08:04:06 UTC 8 years ago

Oh my God. Years ago, we did this for "Highlander" on Usenet. I doubt that one can find it easily online anymore; I'm the slacker in possession of the archive of the site it used to be posted on. :*)

My personal favorite was always, "I'm sorry, Mac. I know they were your pants."

[info]miafeliz

January 14 2004, 20:49:51 UTC 8 years ago

Oh, those were the days. I think the thread starts here. Searching Deja News is so much fun. Those were good days.

[info]deaver

January 14 2004, 09:30:06 UTC 8 years ago

A shadow and a threat have been growing in my pants.

OK, I just snorted due to laughing too hard... darn, now everyone at work thinks I'm crazy!!

[info]minervacat

January 14 2004, 09:35:21 UTC 8 years ago

I stumbled here via friendsfriends, and Pants cannot always be torn in two, Sam. made me snort coffee out my nose.

Thank you, thank you. This is wonderful. :)

[info]cloakofwinter

January 14 2004, 11:21:57 UTC 8 years ago

Don't know ya, but I bet you will recognize this quote:

"Her father used to take her to a park all covered in cheese."

[info]cloakofwinter

January 14 2004, 11:22:38 UTC 8 years ago

I'm in love. I've got a ring, a preacher and some pants. Marry me?

[info]3jane

January 14 2004, 13:55:57 UTC 8 years ago

I wear the pants around here!

[info]cloakofwinter

8 years ago

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[info]3jane

8 years ago

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[info]cloakofwinter

8 years ago

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[info]3jane

8 years ago

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[info]ide_cyan

January 14 2004, 11:24:30 UTC 8 years ago

In his heart Frodo begins to understand. The quest will claim his pants.

Falso prophet! Boooooooooooo!

[info]chancer

January 14 2004, 14:38:04 UTC 8 years ago

"Now for wrack, now for ruin...and the red Pants."

What a terribly infesctious exercise this is. I swear I can't watch the movies seriously now!!

[info]otherpervert

January 14 2004, 15:39:55 UTC 8 years ago

*giggling*

I ask only for the strength to defend my pants.

I will never ever be able to watch that part without hearing Boromir do a little switcheroo with the words again.

Thank you.

[info]ozwolfy

January 14 2004, 15:46:56 UTC 8 years ago

Joining the ranks

*laughs, chokes, wheezes, turns blue*

help! jane's trying to kill us! Okay so it's with humor, love and pants...

heh

[info]rollick

January 14 2004, 18:06:06 UTC 8 years ago

Seen in another LJ: "Tell me, old friend, when did Saruman the Wise abandon pants?"

[info]transtempts

January 14 2004, 20:52:34 UTC 8 years ago

-'He is Aragorn, son of Arathorn and you owe him your pants.'

[info]smithereen

January 14 2004, 22:04:23 UTC 8 years ago

HEE! I always love this game. This is my favorite: A shadow and a threat have been growing in my pants. If it's okay with you, I'd like to make myself a Leggy icon with it. Would be happy to credit you and link back here.

[info]3jane

January 15 2004, 08:03:27 UTC 8 years ago

I demand no credit -- I'm sure other people've already come up with the line. Have fun!

[info]dragonlet

8 years ago

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Anonymous

January 19 2004, 14:49:03 UTC 8 years ago

ang fler pants..

Do you know how pants first came into being? They were trousers once, taken to the dry-cleaners, tortured and mutilated, a ruined and terrible form of clothing.
-Saruman

[info]t3knomanser

January 21 2004, 15:39:05 UTC 8 years ago

"The pants march on Isengaard." ::hums the flight of the valkeryies::
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